March 7, 2017
The Bearded Man (Armada)
**SPOILER ALERT** In the future, many millennia from now, The Bearded Man shaves off his epic beard. But don't worry! None of us will be around to see it. Just like the girl from Arrival, The Bearded Man has always been blessed with the gift of being able to see all of time at once — past, present, and future. Part of what has always made his life so remarkable is that he knows the future, and yet he still lives his life exactly the same way as if he didn't. Not a lot of people can say that. To encourage others to be more beardly in their own paths, The Bearded Man wanted to share a little bit of knowledge of the future with you. One: Artificial Intelligence/Robots will outsmart humanity very soon. Two: People will either become one with the robots or they will die. Three: The Bearded Man can't die. Four: AI can't have beards. So that's it. His consciousness will always live on throughout perpetuity, but his form will have to change. Still, much like Elon Musk, today he's working closely with AI prototypes to ensure that his future brain circuits will feature custom "pool lounge" and "hammock" programs, so he can take the best parts of his old life with him. You've been warned!